My Life With Psoriasis

It's been almost ten years since I first notice a red itchy patch on my forehead, just next to my left brow. It looked silvery white and when I scratch it the white scales would fall out and reveal a redder raised skin. A couple of months later, I discovered new patches on my arm, navel and then my scalp. These round patches were so itchy that after trying some anti-fungal creams (because I thought at first they were some kind of nasty fungi) I went to see a dermatologist because I could no longer take the itch. It was then I found out about the skin disease known as psoriasis.

I cannot count how many dermatologist I have went to since then. I keep on changing doctors if they give me medicines that don't work, or when I sense that they do not have the sympathy on me. Some were honest to tell me there is no cure for this skin disease and some doctors just didn't care. None of these doctors helped me. Their prescriptions would only work with continuous use, but these are expensive I could not keep on using them as well for the fear of side effects. It was one of the most desperate moments of my life that I would cry myself to sleep, then wake up with blood in my fingers the next morning due to scratching my skin even when I'm asleep.

I stopped going to dermatologists and decided to just leave it all to prayers and trying some alternative medicines that I thought might helped. Researching on the internet what might help gave me a lot of confusion and stressed the hell out of me but if I thought that if I stopped trying my condition would get even worse. I was lucky that most of my spots are in the areas covered with clothes and mostly on my scalp.

It's very uncomfortable. I could not wear dark clothes. Dead skin is all over the house, they were all I get when I sweep the floor. At work I get so embarrassed because there's skin under my chair and around my work area. There was a time I had even asked God what have I done to deserve this. I did not even know anyone who had this disease in my family so where did this come from.

This photo was taken in 2008 where you can see the red part on my left brow.

As of this writing, my skin is just fine. I recently discovered that I get flare ups when I lack sleep and constipated. My scalp has never been good. I apply this cheap cream when I feel like I needed to but avoid it as much as I can. The patches on my arm are okay, not very red and I have a few big patches on my legs so I can't really wear shorts and dress. Lately I have been watching a lot of videos about psoriasis home and natural remedy and might try some of them. I have also started incorporated eating healthy food despite a little struggle sometimes.

 I have been dealing with this discomfort for a long time but I realized I should not stop and make it a part of my life. I will still find ways to make my skin well, if not at totally cured. This blog will serve as my diary. I will post updates about the things I have been doing to help  my condition. And if someone who is having the same disease accidentally discovers my blog, I hope it might help them too. There is nothing more depressing than feeling alone while battling this disease so I hope I can help them somehow.

I will not make this post very long, though obviously this is long enough. Expect more post from me about this ugly aspect of my daily living.

Until then...

Claire